I was mindlessly scrolling social media when I saw a post titled “Things nobody knows about me.” It read one line at a time, and as I read each line, I mentally checked it off as if this was me writing my own list.
-Being yelled at makes me shut down. Yep, that’s me, I think to myself.
-I don’t open up to anyone unless I’m close to you. Hmm, okay, on a deeper level, that’s true too.
-Music is my therapy. Check. 100% me.
-When I love, I love hard. Hmm, is this list about me… You get the point. Let’s keep going.
-I distance myself from everyone when life gets tough.
-I put other people’s feelings before my own.
-I give too many chances.
-I am an overthinker.
-I take every word and everything to heart.
-I remember more negative things said to me than positive.
-I just want to be loved.
Unknown author.
This list hit my heart deeply as I sat and reflected on a list by an “unknown author” that very well could have been written by me. I can relate to every line written here, almost so that it gives me chills thinking about how accurate it is. But the reason I am writing about this is what I noticed next: 11.6K likes. 295 comments. 7.9k shares. I am not the only one feeling this way. Many others comment that this is just like them. Many others are sharing that they, too, can relate to this post, if not the entire thing, at least one or several of the lines as well.
How many of us in this world just want to be loved. Or loved in a way that we believe is the right way. Emphasis on the word right. As a psychologist, I have learned that many people understand what love is on a universal level. But, there are so many meanings and definitions of the word love. I’d like to point out though, that just because someone doesn’t love us the way we think we should be loved doesn’t mean they aren’t loving us with everything they are. Or maybe it is reversed. Maybe we are not the one’s able to love them the way they want. However, sometimes I’ve learned, love just isn’t enough. Sometimes, there is too much pain, anger, resentment, trauma, inability to communicate or make our lives compatible in a way that makes love enough.
Sometimes, we can love someone so deeply, but we just can’t stay. There’s a phrase that says love isn’t just a feeling but an action, a choice. We must get up and decide daily to choose the person we want to be with. But what about when there is more pain than happiness every day? Do we choose to keep pushing a circle to fit into a square? I am not here to start an argument on what to do with love, when to fight, and when not. I’m more so just asking questions and recognizing that many more people in the world are facing the same battle than we realize, at least this social media post suggests. In a world so full of judgment, fear, rejection, abandonment, and hate- people just want to be loved, and accepted, I would add.
I think some people want to be loved who aren’t. Some people want to be loved in a way that they’re not being loved now. Some people don’t know what love is. And some people think something is love when it really isn’t. I know I can say, as a woman who has struggled with many of these things, it can be difficult to understand how to keep your heart guarded but also be vulnerable. To love and allow yourself to be loved. To know how to love without conditions, and still maintain boundaries, and ask for respect. How do we remain lovable and love authentically? Perhaps the answer isn’t finding the perfect way to be loved but embracing the love within and around us—even if it looks different than we expected. Love is not just about receiving; it’s about giving, understanding, and growing. It’s in the small moments, the quiet kindness, the resilience to keep showing up, even when the world feels heavy.
We are not alone in our longing. The fact that so many people resonate with these words proves that love—real, deep, and imperfect—connects us all. Maybe the journey isn’t about seeking love in its perfect form but about learning to recognize it in its many shapes, to nurture it, and most importantly, to offer it to ourselves. Because at the end of the day, love starts within. And when we learn to embrace our own worth, we open ourselves to love in ways we never imagined. Keep hoping. Keep loving. And most of all, keep believing that you are and always have been, worthy of love.
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